Is money a big motivator for you?
Often in my conversations with couples, I’ve found that people who are motivated by money are reluctant to admit it. When they do, it’s often with a sense of shame: “I wish I wasn’t motivated by money, but I am.”
That’s unfortunate. People can be motivated by money for a variety of really good reasons: they want to provide for their family, they want to get out of debt, they have big goals (like retiring early, starting their own business, or creating a rock-solid emergency fund). They know the more money they make, the closer they can get to their goals.
Are you or your partner motivated by money? Here are some ways you can turn that motivation from a sense of shame into a source of strength:
Understand Your “Why”: Where does your money motivation come from? Are you looking to create more financial security than your parents had? Are you hoping to retire early? Are you hustling to pay for your child’s college education? Once you can name the goal (or goals) you are hoping to rake in that cash for, let that goal be your guiding light as you seek to find more money-making opportunities. Take pride in the way that you are helping your family reach these goals.
Tip: In a relationship with someone who is not motivated by money? Use this goal to help them understand your pursuit.
Know Your Limits: Don’t take on additional money-making opportunities without considering the trade-offs. For instance, are you willing to stay up late to work an extra hour or two if it means you can tuck your kids into bed first? What if your side hustle takes you away from the house on weekends? Let your “why” be your guide as to what opportunities are most worthwhile for you.
Tip: You don’t need to say “yes” to every money-making opportunity that comes your way. Be willing to say “no” when the trade-off just isn’t worth it. Or, take the time to negotiate with your limits clearly in mind. Who knows? You may be able to have your cake and eat it, too.
Work Smarter, Not Harder: What if you could bring in more money without necessarily putting in more hours? Start by looking for the easy wins: Take the time to research what your work is worth. Find there’s room for growth? Ask for a raise or see if there’s a way to incorporate a bonus or commission into your work. Take a closer look at the benefits your employer offers, and if you find special rates on services you already use (like your cell phone or public transportation), use the discounts and bank the savings towards your goal(s).
Tip: Balancing a side hustle alongside a regular job isn’t easy, but it can be a great way to explore your passions and bring in more money. You may even consider setting aside a few of your vacation days for other money making ventures. For instance, I used to take time off from my full-time job to do speaking events. I was paid in full for the day off and paid for my speaking event on top of it. Plus, I didn’t have to give up precious weekend time. I set a limit of a few days I would use for this purpose each year so I could still take vacations with my partner.
Make Your Partner Your Ally: You may be in a relationship with someone who’s just as money-motivated as you, but if you aren’t, remember they may have trouble understanding your motivations, particularly if you’re working in a role you’re less passionate about just to make more money. In those times, anchor back to your “why.” Talk to your partner about the limits and trade-offs of your pursuit for more money and ask them to hold you accountable.
Tip: If, like me, you struggle with saying “no” to new and exciting opportunities, commit to making all career or side-hustle decisions with your partner. When my husband and I weigh the pros and cons together, we often see these situations from different perspectives. He’s particularly good at holding me to my limits and helping me see the full trade-offs so I don’t eagerly say “yes” to an opportunity that isn’t right for me.
Remember Those Less Privileged Than You: Don’t be so laser-focused on your own goals that you lose sight of others. Having opportunities to bring in money and meet those goals is a privilege. Not everyone has access to those same opportunities due to systemic injustice, discrimination, and prejudice present in our world today. As you climb the ladder of success, be sure to lift up others as well. Of course you can do this through advocacy and volunteering, but I encourage you to also do it with how you give and spend your money.
Tip: No particular cause capturing your attention? Create a giving fund. Set aside a portion of the money you make so you can be generous with immediate needs as they arise — like supporting a GoFundMe page or buying a grocery store gift card for a friend who is out of work.
In this month’s Date Night Club we’ll be taking a deeper dive into this topic. Date Night Club is my recipe to take the stress out of talking about money with your partner — delivered fresh to your inbox every month. Find out more and sign up today!